Anger vs. Hatred

By: Sherry Gaudreau

“You keep talking about changing the world through meditation and compassion, but isn’t anger faster?”

Anger is not necessarily a bad thing. It's natural, His Holiness the Dalai Lama says. However, just because it’s natural, doesn’t mean it’s beneficial. We feel angry when confronted by something we know is wrong, such as animal abuse. The Dalai Lama admits to feeling angry when a subject like this comes up. However, sometimes we take our anger too far. Frequently, hatred comes along with the anger.

The difference between anger and hatred is hard to distinguish once we’re angry. Hatred arises when people want revenge, the Dalai Lama says. Anger means you want to change things for the better.  Once angry, we can easily be lead to hatred. Just as a spark can turn into a flame.

Another subject the Dalai Lama has spoken about that relates to anger is how to teach our children not to be angry.  His answer is, “children always look to their parents. Parents should be calm. You can teach children that you face a lot of problems but you must react to those problems with a clam mind and reason.”  That raises the question of what to do when children misbehave? The Dalai Lama urges people to not act angry no matter how hard it is! Everyone has to practice remaining calm and remembering that they are just children. WE are the ones that are shaping them into becoming good people.

Steps to a healthier relationship with anger:

1) Accept your anger
2) Breathe
3) Take responsibility for your anger
4) Distinguish anger from hatred
5) Acknowledge your hurt
6) Let Go 
7) Cultivate kindness

His Holiness the Dalai Lama will speak on Oct. 18 and 19 at Western Connecticut State University, and the public is invited to a free showing (video simulcast) in the Ives Concert Hall, 181 White St. To help promote this opportunity, WCSU students in the Writing and Linguistics Department's Advertising, Copywriting and Promotions class created a Twitter page. and they are writing this blog daily.